Poetry on life after narcissistic abuse / emotional abuse
We used to take steamy showers together,
but now it’s not the heat burning my skin —
it’s the reason behind your denial; it’s her.
You spent hours tending to your appearance
that day — waxing, shaving, putting on cologne,
and the clothes that made you irresistible.
I questioned you in my mind, but only my mind,
because I knew you would think it sounded crazy,
but the truth came out later when she told me about
my obsession with you and my denial about your
true nature. It was all she could talk about, but she
was just as clueless as she painted me to be.
You were in it for the made-up payoff and manipulation,
exactly what you’ve always used sex for — to get women
to do what you wanted them to or to feel a certain way.
When I questioned you on that day and any other,
you had only two words for me. You were “just kidding,”
but I know the only joke between the three of us is you.
While you pretended to love both of us, you couldn’t
hide from your truth — living as a monster who has
never been capable of love, hope, or understanding.
In turn, you will never earn those things from me.